In a perfect world, we would all be able to have the wedding of our dreams without having to worry at all in the slightest about how much it would cost.
In the real world, that is just not the case.
When brides call me for the first time to inquire on my
services, I ask them a few basic questions.
- What time of year do you want to get married?
- What city would you like to get married in?
- Do you want the ceremony & reception at the same location?
- How many bridesmaids & groomsmen?
- How many guests are you planning on inviting?
- What kind of wedding do you want to have? Overall look and feel?
- What is your Wedding Budget?
By the time I get to question #7, there is usually always
some sort of hesitance in that answer. Sometimes I think it is because people are a little uncomfortable
speaking of money, sometimes they fear that I am going to charge them more if I
think they have money, some people are programmed to be negotiators and feel
that the first rule of negotiating is never to be the first one to come up with
a number, but most times it is because they really don’t know.
Now, a lot of wedding planners out there will tell you that
they will not touch a wedding if the couple’s budget is under $75,000. I don’t take that approach. My motto is that as long as the budget is
realistic to the couples guest list and priorities, it is doable.
So, what is a realistic budget?
Let’s look at a scenario for a wedding of 150 guests in the
city of San Francisco in June with a wedding budget of $50,000.
Keep in mind that the reception will cost you at the very
least 50% of your entire budget and in most cases, depending on the venue a
little more than that. The reception is
comprised of your venue rental, food, bar and cake. With a total budget of $50,000, we have
$25,000 to dedicate to the reception. Sound’s like a lot, doesn’t it?
An average reception scenario would be a venue rental of
$6,500 and the cake including the delivery is $1,200. The food comes out to $85 per person + 18%
service charge + 8.25% sales tax which is equal to $16,286.21. Then of course you have the bar which is
equal to $20 per person + 18% service charge + 8.25% sales tax which comes out
to $3832.05.
Reception Budget Summary:
$6,500 venue rental
$1,200 cake
$16,286.21 food
$3,832.05 bar
Grand Total for Reception: $27,818.26 --- over budget by $2,818.26
Now you have $22,181.74 left over for everything else.
Dress, Alterations, shoes, undergarments, jewelry ($2,000 to
$8,000)
Hair, Make-up ($550 - $1,200)
Officiant ($500 - $950)
Ceremony venue ($500 - $1,200)
Ceremony Music ($350 - $850)
Tuxedo, shirt, tie, shoes, cuff links ($100 - $1,200)
Flowers ($1,800 - $5,500)
Lighting ($550 - $2,500)
Linens ($950 - $1,250)
Chairs ($1,450 - $1,950)
Save The Dates ($50 - $250)
Invitations ($375 - $900)
Programs ($300 - $750)
Escort Cards ($200 - $500)
Favors ($300 - $1,000)
Wedding Day Transportation ($500 - $2,500)
DJ or Band ($1800 - $10,000)
Photography ($5,500 - $10,000)
Videography ($1,800 - $7,500)
Gifts for your attendants ($75 - $300)
Gifts for each other ($200 - $1,000)
Gifts for your parents ($200 - $1,000)
Grand Total of everything else could range from $20,050
which is the low end of everything and $60,300 which is among the higher end.
Now, I am not saying all of this to scare you. You can do a lot to get those numbers
down! It all depends on your style,
priorities and flexibility.
What can you do to reduce the cost of the wedding?
Be Flexible!! You can
get married in the East Bay; have the ceremony
and reception in the same location; have the wedding at a time of the year
that is not considered peak wedding season; use the existing linens and chairs that the venue offers; shop for your
wedding gown online or at shops that are not expensive; hire a DJ instead of live musicians; have a simple menu; a bar that consists
purely of beer & wine; order a very simple 3 tiered cake with fresh flowers
to adorn it; rely on your florist to
choose flowers within your colors and style that are grown locally and are in
season; cut your guest list.
If someone comes to me and shows me a wedding featured in Grace Ormond
for example with a 7 tiered cake, a bar
chiseled out of ice, lounge furniture, amazing lighting, chiavari chairs,
custom linens, flowers as far as the eye can see and a 10 piece band and say, I
have 150 guest and my budget is $50,000 and I want it to look like this, I say
it is NOT possible. That would be an
unrealistic budget.
VS.
If someone comes to me and says, I have $50,000 to spend and
150 guests. I love the look of this
wedding in Grace Ormond, BUT I know we can’t have all the bells and whistles.
Let’s get creative. I am flexible on the
date and location, but I love the color scheme of this wedding in the
magazine. Can we make something
happen? I say…ABSOLUTELY!
Weddings in the San Francisco Bay Area cost so much more
than any other part of this state or country for that matter (with the exception of a few other cities). It is so important to be
flexible and have realistic expectations. If you go into it with that frame of mind, then you will have a
beautiful wedding that will be reflective of you and your style and priorities. That is the kind of wedding that will be
enjoyed and remembered by all who are involved and most of all by you.
Final Note
Please, please, please don’t lose sight of what you
are actually doing here. You are getting
married to the person who you love and want to share the rest of your life
with. Do not let money and wedding
planning let you forget about that. No
matter how many guests, how beautiful the flowers or how good the food will
taste, nothing compares to the person you are marrying. That is what is most important and nothing else!
