The Wedding Budget

In a perfect world, we would all be able to have the wedding of our dreams without having to worry at all in the slightest about how much it would cost.

In the real world, that is just not the case.

When brides call me for the first time to inquire on my services, I ask them a few basic questions. 

1. What time of year do you want to get married?
2. What city would you like to get married in?
3. Do you want the ceremony & reception at the same location?
4. How many bridesmaids & groomsmen?
5. How many guests are you planning on inviting?
6. What kind of wedding do you want to have? Overall look and feel?
7. What is your Wedding Budget? 

By the time I get to question #7, there is usually always some sort of hesitance in that answer. Sometimes I think it is because people are a little uncomfortable speaking of money, sometimes they fear that I am going to charge them more if I think they have money, some people are programmed to be negotiators and feel that the first rule of negotiating is never to be the first one to come up with a number, but most times it is because they really don’t know. 

Now, a lot of wedding planners out there will tell you that they will not touch a wedding if the couple’s budget is under $75,000. I don’t take that approach. My motto is that as long as the budget is realistic to the couples guest list and priorities, it is doable.  

So, what is a realistic budget? 

Let’s look at a scenario for a wedding of 150 guests in the city of San Francisco in June with a wedding budget of $50,000.

Keep in mind that the reception will cost you at the very least 50% of your entire budget and in most cases, depending on the venue a little more than that. The reception is comprised of your venue rental, food, bar and cake. With a total budget of $50,000, we have $25,000 to dedicate to the reception. Sound’s like a lot, doesn’t it? 

An average reception scenario would be a venue rental of $6,500 and the cake including the delivery is $1,200. The food comes out to $85 per person + 18% service charge + 8.25% sales tax which is equal to $16,286.21. Then of course you have the bar which is equal to $20 per person + 18% service charge + 8.25% sales tax which comes out to $3832.05.  

Reception Budget Summary:
$6,500 venue rental
$1,200 cake
$16,286.21 food
$3,832.05 bar
Grand Total for Reception: $27,818.26 --- over budget by $2,818.26 

Now you have $22,181.74 left over for everything else.

Dress, Alterations, shoes, undergarments, jewelry ($2,000 to $8,000)
Hair, Make-up ($550 - $1,200)
Officiant ($500 - $950)
Ceremony venue ($500 - $1,200)
Ceremony Music ($350 - $850)
Tuxedo, shirt, tie, shoes, cuff links ($100 - $1,200)
Flowers ($1,800 - $5,500)
Lighting ($550 - $2,500)
Linens ($950 - $1,250)
Chairs ($1,450 - $1,950)
Save The Dates ($50 - $250)
Invitations ($375 - $900)
Programs ($300 - $750)
Escort Cards ($200 - $500)
Favors ($300 - $1,000)
Wedding Day Transportation ($500 - $2,500)
DJ or Band ($1800 - $10,000)
Photography ($5,500 - $10,000)
Videography ($1,800 - $7,500)
Gifts for your attendants ($75 - $300)
Gifts for each other ($200 - $1,000)
Gifts for your parents ($200 - $1,000)

Grand Total of everything else could range from $20,050 which is the low end of everything and $60,300 which is among the higher end. 

Now, I am not saying all of this to scare you. You can do a lot to get those numbers down! It all depends on your style, priorities and flexibility. 

What can you do to reduce the cost of the wedding?  

Be Flexible!! You can get married in the East Bay; have the ceremony and reception in the same location; have the wedding at a time of the year that is not considered peak wedding season;  use the existing linens and chairs that the venue offers; shop for your wedding gown online or at shops that are not expensive;  hire a DJ instead of live musicians; have a simple menu; a bar that consists purely of beer & wine; order a very simple 3 tiered cake with fresh flowers to adorn it;  rely on your florist to choose flowers within your colors and style that are grown locally and are in season; cut your guest list.

If someone comes to me and shows me a wedding featured in Grace Ormond for example with a 7 tiered cake, a bar chiseled out of ice, lounge furniture, amazing lighting, chiavari chairs, custom linens, flowers as far as the eye can see and a 10 piece band and say, I have 150 guest and my budget is $50,000 and I want it to look like this, I say it is NOT possible. That would be an unrealistic budget. 

VS. 

If someone comes to me and says, I have $50,000 to spend and 150 guests. I love the look of this wedding in Grace Ormond, BUT I know we can’t have all the bells and whistles. Let’s get creative. I am flexible on the date and location, but I love the color scheme of this wedding in the magazine. Can we make something happen? I say…ABSOLUTELY!  

Weddings in the San Francisco Bay Area cost so much more than any other part of this state or country for that matter (with the exception of a few other cities).  It is so important to be flexible and have realistic expectations. If you go into it with that frame of mind, then you will have a beautiful wedding that will be reflective of you and your style and priorities. That is the kind of wedding that will be enjoyed and remembered by all who are involved and most of all by you.

Final Note 

Please, please, please don’t lose sight of what you are actually doing here. You are getting married to the person who you love and want to share the rest of your life with. Do not let money and wedding planning let you forget about that. No matter how many guests, how beautiful the flowers or how good the food will taste, nothing compares to the person you are marrying.  That is what is most important and nothing else!